Thursday, October 31, 2013

The Carbon Games

I fell into a burning ring or fire

-Johnny Cash

Fire all of your guns
Explode into space



      I was watching ESPN the other day  - What?  ESPN isn't appropriate?    Actually, I'll have you know that ESPN is a leading outlet for the real news.   For instance?  I'll give you for instance.  How about the ground breaking coverage of peak oil and climate change?  The Ultimate Race = Which Will End the World First?    Try to find such coverage on Fox News!  Ha!  New York Times?  I think not.
     Be that as it may - the show I was watching was slightly less forward thinking - but still very entertaining  - Demolition derby involving  motor homes.   If you watch it, I think you'll have to agree - pretty darn cool!.

    It got me to thinking.   A lot of entertainment happens to burn a lot of carbon.  Consider NASCAR for instance.  Its the fastest growing "sport" in America. !  Well , OK, it used to be.    But its still big.   Despite higher gas prices, people still enjoy watching cars race and crash at high speeds.  I wonder how much gas gets burned at a NASCAR event. Hmmm...

NASCAR race cars have very little in common with the car in your driveway. These vehicles have tremendously powerful engines that are not equipped with any of the devices that the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency mandates for normal cars, such as catalytic converters. Plus, they regularly reach speeds approaching 200 miles per hour (322 kilometers per hour). Because of this, a typical NASCAR race car gets about 5 miles per gallon fuel efficiency during a race that lasts for 500 miles. More than 40 cars usually compete in each NASCAR race, so 6,000 gallons (22,712 liters) of fuel or more are burned during a NASCAR event [source: Finney].

       6000 gallons!  Over a weened!   That's pretty impressive!    But can't we do better?   I think so.  This is America,  folks!

         So, in the spirit of competition  (which makes this nation great!)   I propose the Carbon Games.   A contest to see who can come up with the way to burn to most carbon. 

 Of course there would have to be a variety of categories such as:

         Fastest burn!      This of course would be the main event.    Rockets!  Flame throwers!   Explosions!   How about cars with flame throwers?  (kind a perfect combo - a two-fer!)

     Most carbon per dollar!    This would give some of your backyard inventors a decent shot.  Bonfires!    Super big slash burns!   (not that big - but nice music)

      Most artistic!    Flaming pumpkins propelled by trebuchet     and of course,    Burning Man!   (very impressive! - fire dancers, explosions burning man and his burning ship, I think)

  So anyway,   I welcome your suggestions.   

   Monster Trucks, move over!  Here comes the Carbon Games!

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